Not an outdoor egg chair, not even slightly..

 

Nothing about this says 'Outdoor egg chair' at all. Not even if you squint. 

And yet when I opened up my Outdoor Egg Chair box expressly delivered from the factory in Guangxi China, I was met with these...15 martial arts trophies.

Do I know any martial arts? Er no. Not unless Beer Fu or Drink Dat are a thing now (Burpo the work experience kid did mention being fluent in Wu Tang though, whatever that means.)

I also have no idea what you'd want to do with them either, unless you're planning on opening your own Wing Ding Whoo Har Dojo of Defense or something and you don't have any accolades on hand. Maybe give them as gifts? Maybe cheer someone up with one?

'Hey Barney, sorry to hear that your wife left you and took the kids...on a lighter note you're now a master of Whoo Hoo!'

Although they can also double as very handy and impressive doorstops..

Eh, a soggy five dollar note and you can fill up a bag with em. If anyone needs me, I'll be in the corner over here lamenting my missing egg chair..